A Journal

Location: Stanford, California, United States

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Dearest Journal,

Sorry I've left you neglected for so long. Somedays I feel like writing. Somedays I don't. But most days, I just do not have the time.

I just want to write about last night in order to keep the memory, to remind myself of the human condition, and to correct the mistake that I have fallen into.

Put it simply. Last night was amazing.

Maybe it was because I had no stress after the midterm. Maybe it was because it was a Friday. Maybe it was because of the music selection. Still, I felt sillier than I have in awhile, and I felt like I was able to let loose. Truth be told, I dreaded going on the ice. Everytime I go, I have to relearn the little motor skill it takes to awkwardly propel, nay, paddle, myself forward with my skates. Something has got to be wrong with my cerebellum. Or maybe the whole activity is too feminine for me to master. But skating hand in hand with Peng, I felt so much better. It was like I was using him as a human balance--what a slut. haha

Skating, bantering, and hanging out with Peng, Helen, Yao, Francis, Jonathan, everybody, I felt completely at peace with myself and completely happy. Ever since freshman year started, I've had this preconception of what I want my friendships to be like because of the Goons and Andrew. After not finding anybody nearly like them, I felt alone. What I have with the Goons is very special. I miss them so much, but I cannot expect all my friends and my friendships to be like that. After last night, I've realized that. From this day on, I vouch to not resent Stanford anymore. I hope.

Mmmmmmmm. Paul McCartney: This Never Happened Before